My Reviews about Friend & Friendship

by Ali Asgar Bakul
Friends are precious things in life, and they are not to be taken for granted. Some friendships are formed in early childhood and last for many years. Others may form during a certain chapter of your life, such as college, but gradually weaken as you move into adulthood. Some friendships sadly end terribly. So, why are there so many possibilities? And, why do people say it is hard to find real friends in life? Well, the answers are in the definition of friendship. What is friendship? Friendship is a special relationship. It runs deeper than an acquaintanceship. Friends do not just hang out; their bond is much deeper. Friends share some things in common, and that is what the foundation of their friendship is built upon. Below are characteristics of a true friendship.
* Friendship is about mutual admiration, respect and trust.
Based on this first characteristic, you can quickly see why real friendships are sometimes few and far between. True friends really do admire one another. This kind of admiration is not cheap flattery. It is instead based on many traits such as intelligence, character, sense of humor, athleticism and abilities. It takes time to develop this kind of admiration, as it is a deep-seeded one. It also takes time for mutual respect and trust to develop, but they do exist in a strong friendship. Respect means that friends try to be reliable to one another. They are open to each other's opinions. And, they listen to them. Friends trust each other to some of their biggest secrets. Oftentimes, a good friend knows some of the things you have done that bring you shame. They have seen you in your most insecure form. They know more about the real you more than most. And, the intimacies that are shared are kept between two friends. When you have a major problem, a friend is someone you can confide in, and you do not have to worry. You know that you will not be harshly judged, although your friend may show some valid concern.
* Friendship endures bad times.
It's easy to meet someone and start hanging out with them. It can be loads of fun! You may like the same movies or music. You may share a love of golf. But, many of these types of relationships are not friendships. They are simply buddies. And, you will know who your friends are, versus your buddies, when the going gets tough. Friends are willing to be around you when you are not at your best. They are not out solely for a good time. They will not run away when you have issues.
by Sheila-Ann Bender
"True friendship is sitting together in silence and feeling like it was the best conversation you've ever had." I really love this definition of friendship. Talking without words. This sort of mirrors another quote on love the 1970 movie, "Love Story" made famous: "Love means never having to say you're sorry". Friendship means hearing what's inside one's heart even when they can't find the words to say it. Best friends not only listen to what you say-they listen to what you don't say. Friendship is a shared sense of caring and concern. It is a desire to see one another grow and develop. They can accompany you on the journey to personal growth. They shouldn't agree with everything you say or make you feel inadequate. Cher once said, "I can trust my friends. These people force me to examine, encourage me to grow." Friends always encourage-always. True friends have a deep hope for each other to succeed in all aspects of life. There is no room for jealousy or envy in friendship. Friends always support, always rejoice with each other over triumphs in life. Shared joy is double joy. Communication is an integral component of friendship. It requires reciprocity. In a mutually satisfying relationship, both friends talk and both friends listen. They don't monopolize every conversation, leaving the other very little room to talk. In the same token, always the listener is a counselor, not a friend. "Good communication is as stimulating as black coffee and just as hard to sleep after." Conversation between best friends is never boring. Friendship is built on trust and loyalty. Friends should be able to share their deepest innermost secrets without fear of ridicule. It requires an emotional commitment, vulnerability and honesty. True friends can help each other let go of the baggage of the past that has haunted them for a lifetime. Marcel Proust once said, "We are healed of a suffering only by expressing it to the full." Best friends are the best therapists! When searching for definitions of friendship in dictionaries, I came across everything from "one attached to another by affection or esteem" to "a person to whom one likes". I actually liked the definition of a friend written by King Solomon in the Bible the best. "A true companion is loving at all times, and is a brother that is born for when there is distress (in our lives). Our health may fail us, our material possessions will lose their value, but a true friendship grows stronger and flourishes with time." (Proverbs 17:17). It is often said that a best friend is the sister or brother that destiny forgot to give you. Life gives us our family members-we have no say in the matter. We choose our friendships. Because of this, the bond between good friends is truly thicker than blood. A popular quote says, "One loyal friend is better than 10,000 family members". Way back in the Garden of Eden, Adam was actually created to be the friend of God. God did not design us to be alone on this earth-he wants us to have friends and meaningful relationships in life. The Bible is actually a handbook for true friendship from cover to cover. Lee Iacocca's father said, "If you only have a handful of real friends when you die, you've had a great life." Friends are undoubtedly the angels that follow us all through life.